Are All Aaron's Arrogant?

Damn that title has a lot of A's! I got this message below today and when I checked out his profile, it was a no-brainer that he was not the right guy for me....must be the name!

His message to me:

Hello. Finally someone that qualifies with my standards and what I am looking for. You are cute. I'm Aaron

Now, is it me or does he already sound like a pompous ass?  It's nice that he thinks I'm cute, but knowing I meet his "standards" just sounds a little conceited.  But I could be wrong, so I guess I should see what his profile has to offer....

The first two things I notice make me laugh hysterically.  First, the guy is wearing a turtleneck sweater.  Can you say Metro and/or high maintenance?  And then I notice his height...he's a whopping 5'8" tall.  So obviously a case of short-man syndrome! Sure it isn't THAT short, but when I put on my kick ass red heels, I will be starting him straight in the eye and I am just not okay with that.  He's a little puny too, even though he says he has an athletic body....maybe a runner or swimmer, but he is definitely not hitting the gym! Now, I only say this because I have the need to be with a guy that I know can take care of me.  If I fall down drunk on my ass (or in a pool....that's for you Schumann), I want to know that he can come to my rescue.  I

My next eyebrow raise came when I saw the question "do you drink?"  Now if you have read an earlier blog of mine about my first date with POF, you would know that this question is of extreme importance.  Not that I wouldn't date a non-drinker, but it could definitely be an issue since I like my alcohol every once in a while.  The funny thing is that most people answer "socially," but they are all full of shit (as am I since I answered that too and drink more than socially.)  It's either that or answer "often," but who wants to be played up as drunk?  Anyway, his answer was "prefer not to say." Uh, why the fuck not?  Excuse my sailor mouth, but what would make anyone answer that?  I figure he must really have strong views about drinking or he is just trying to hide being a raging alcoholic.  But either way, RED FLAG!

His interests:

Sushi (okay, that is a plus)
Beer (so he has GOT to be an alcoholic, right?!?!)
Attention (again, short-man syndrome)
Punctuality (good cause I hate to be late)
Responsilbe (that is his typo, not mine...so he's not one for spell check)
Nice caring Woman (hmmm, I don't think I know any haha)
Smelling good (at least I know he bathes)
Being silly and of course, open about things (interesting combination)


About him:

Poker, hiking, going for sushi, movies, bowling, drinking beer with friends, skiing/snowboarding.

There is no way to describe me on paper, okay screen, people say I am unique.  Looking for a nice sexy female to spoil.  I have lots of energy but absolutely hate drama and fighting, I just won't do it.  Oh yeah, I won't date anyone who has children and I won't go out to Peoria or Glendale...done that plenty of times. Over it.


I am still laughing!  I mean, it's great that he knows what he wants, but I guess to me, he's obviously got some issues.  Tact is definitely not a strong suit of this one!  Hopefully you got a little chuckle as well.

No Such Thing as a First Impression Redo

I decided shortly after starting this online dating experience that most guys really don't have a clue on how to pick up on a girl.  Sure there are a few out there that are exempt from this (and should be available for consultation), but most just don't get it.  There are three very important things to catch our attention and get s to message you - your photos, your screen name and your first message sent to us.  Here are a few things I have observed lately:

PHOTOS

This is the most important thing you are putting online - it's the first thing we see and come on, looks are what draw us all in initially to you.  How are we supposed to find out that you are a neurosurgeon if you have posted an unflattering photo? There are a few rules that guys should be aware of before posting their mug:

•  Photos taken in a bathroom mirror where you can see all your shit on the sink or even the toilet, really should be avoided.  I don't care how pretty you are - it just has a major ick factor! Either learn how to crop your photo or get someone else to take it!
• As much as I would like to gawk at your chiseled abs, putting that up as your main photo just shouts out "man whore." You bet I will click on your photo and check you out, but I will be slightly leery of you and what your motives are.
• We need to see your FACE! Of course I want to see a full body shot, but when you don't post a very good one of your face, it's really hard to make a fair assessment.  I'd hate to judge you unfairly due to a grainy, unclear photo.
• Photos with other girls is NO BUENO.  Do you really think you are going to pick up other girls when you have photos posted with other ones? At least have the decency to post that it is your sister, otherwise you could be overlooked quite quickly.  Oh, and if you have one posted of you and a kid - you MUST specify if it is yours or not!  
• Have more than one.  Granted, I don't need to spend 10 minutes going through all of them, but at least three would be nice. 

Maybe I should open up a side business to take candid photos for guys dating online - looks like it could be a pretty good money maker from what I have been seeing lately!


SCREEN NAMES

Along with the profile photo, your screen name is another thing that jumps out at us early on.  I know it's not easy to put together something that is both creative and catchy, but some sort of effort should be put into it and someone else really should proof it for you before you commit yourself to it!

Examples of ones that make me roll my eyes - talk about full of yourself!

• GymPlaya
• AZhot36
• attractiveguy30
• topshelf-lover
• Ais4Awesome
• Shecallzmepapi

I can't believe that some girls fall for guys with screen names like that! Of course I always check out their profiles and then get a good laugh out of how conceited some them are.  Guess it keeps things interesting!


PICK-UP LINES

For me, this is by far the most important piece of the puzzle if you want me to respond back to you.  It's like the 4th and 2 decision to go for it or punt it - it can MAKE OR BREAK YOU!  Be funny and original, but not to the point of weirdness where I want to block you from all existence.  I don't need a novel the first go round, but just saying "hi" is pathetic and I don't care how gorgeous you are, if that is all you got, you will get a big ole delete from me! and probably the most important thing, read my damn profile so you can prevent yourself from putting your foot in your mouth straight out of the gate.  Mine lists that I am a Packers fan and there is a photo of me in a Rodgers jersey - if you ask me who my team is (and idiots have), you will not get anything back from me (even though I want to be a smart ass back to you SO badly)!

Once I start chatting with someone, I bust out my make or break question, which I think everyone should have one.  Before I give my name or my number out, all guys must answer - Coke or Pepsi?  And yes, there is a difference and I have weeded out a few thanks to this unique question.  The best answer to this by far came from dear old Chicago, which could be why he is still in the running! Haha

Can You Say Obession?

Maybe I should put a disclaimer on my profile that states that I HAVE A LIFE! It amazes me how many morons out there send you a second message when you don't respond to them right away.  Usually it's just a message or two and there is the occasional asshole who makes an idiotic comment that really isn't worth my time anyway, but this one takes the cake.  It's not our entire conversation, which started back on 10/24, but you'll get the idea that he is one step closer to becoming a blocked user!  The times are all jacked up, so only pay attention to how much time is in between them.  My response is listed below in Red :)

10/25/2012 6:18:55 AM your ex must have been crazy to let you get away but i guess it is good since i can talk to you now.

10/25/2012 7:02:06 AM So good night and it was good talking a little. Don't be a stranger write whenever so ttyl Rachel

10/26/2012 5:51:02 AM Good evening Rachel how was your day ?

10/27/2012 6:12:21 PM i see you are one hard lady to speak to Rachel dang that stinks. well have a good day then

10/27/2012 6:48:36 PM This is just a really busy time for me right now. My schedule is pretty hectic with the relay I'm running in over in Tennessee in two weeks - there's a lot to do! I hope you understand...I'm not ignoring you intentionally! :)

10/27/2012 7:02:32 PM Hello there Miss Rachel. I understand you are a busy lady and I hope you do good in your relay. You caught my attention for a reason so I will just have to wait and eventually take you out. At least you wrote me back and that does make me happy.

10/27/2012 10:59:43 PM How about when you come back I take you out? I will plan something fun and you will have a blast. You can save it so when your ready 480-652-0800.

10/28/2012 2:07:51 AM I bet you get a lot of messages so I better do work. You are one gorgeous lady

10/28/2012 6:38:27 AM I know we will talk more eventually and just to make sure you know when I said I can wait its because with school and wanting to get into a new job I am in no hurry plus I am interested in getting to know you. Hope you are having a good weekend good night

10/28/2012 8:17:52 PM so i am feeling like a major bug so i am not gonna write anymore unless i hear from you. i know you are very busy and i am just feeling bad now for bugging you. so if you want to talk great have a great day. :-(

The thing that makes me laugh the most is that I told this guy up front that my schedule was crazy with my parents in town and all the other things that I have going on over the next two weeks....sounds like he need to get a life!

Guys on the Bench

So while Schmidt and Chicago are the two that I focus the most energy on, there are a handful of others that I have had some communication with over the last two weeks or so.  Not counting any of these out just yet, but they are definitely still on the bench!

HAWAIIAN JOE

This handsome fella was one of the first ones that I ended up messaging with back when I started this whole online dating thing. One of the most appealing things about him (besides his boy next door looks), is that he has a life and is busy.  Sure that may sound strange, but I really am not looking for someone to occupy a huge majority of my time just yet.  We have been texting off and on over the past month or so, but our schedules have not allowed us to meet yet.  One cool thing we have in common is that he lived up in Seattle and even has a house there. Not sure if anything will come of this one, but at least he's a nice guy to talk to!


THE TEDDY BEAR

This one started out by me clicking on his profile on accident (hard to see the pics on my phone)! He's not my typical type of guy, but when I found out he was from Wisconsin (Packer fan) and had a sense of humor, I thought I could at least strike up a conversation.  We met for a quick dinner before a softball game of his two weeks ago and it went pretty well.  Turns out he is a paramedic that is going to school to be a pediatric nurse.  We both share a love for kids, which is a pretty cool thing.  Quite a few things in common but there just isn't a physical attraction there for me.  He's asked about going to lunch or even out for dinner, but his schedule is insane and doesn't seem to match up with mine.  At least he isn't a needy guy that texts me constantly asking about hanging out! So we'll see.....


MILE HIGH  

Found myself a pilot the other day! Limited chatting so far, but his profile indicates that he has his shit together. We have exchanged numbers and hopefully coffee will be in our future one of these days when he is on the ground.

Schmidt vs Chicago

Wow, I can't believe how badly I have bee slacking off on updating this!!  Thankfully there isn't too much that has happened, but I have been bothered by a few people to get my ass on here and post an update!  I had my parents in town, so no new dates last week, but there was still plenty of chatting going on!

SCHMIDT

We have a front runner! I didn't get a chance to blog about a few Sunday nights ago with this awesome guy.  Anyone who is willing to spend a Sunday night with me on the couch watching the last two episodes of Dexter is a winner in my book!  There is something about him that is just comforting and makes him so easy to be around.  I could have laid on the couch with my head in his lap with him stroking my hair for hours.  Of course that didn't happen and what would follow would be completely mind blowing and AMAZING! All I can say is that Schmidt has some major skills!

I had to go over a week without seeing him and when time finally was freed up, it happened to be on a day when I got some not so great family news.  I explained to him what happened and mentioned that I might not be in the best emotional state to hang out with him.  He simply replied, "I'll still come over, just so you don't have to be alone." Are you serious? Is he for real? When I questioned his motives (jokingly of course), he said his goal was to give me a hug, snuggle up on the couch (more Dexter of course), and hopefully make my end better than it had started.  And boy did he succeed!

He's out of town for a few days, so no Schmidt updates for a while......
 

CHICAGO

Okay, so I haven't kicked him completely to the curb just yet.  The consensus from those around me could be that his need to be funny/right all the time could just be a case of the nerves.  The girls say I should tell him and the guys tell to give him another shot.  So this time I listened to the guys (with fingers crossed hoping they would be right for ONCE).  Even though Friday was the end of a long week, I took Chicago up on his offer to hang to out.  At first, he offered up tickets to the Suns game with two of his friends, but both of us didn't feel like driving into town or being out amongst the masses.  We settled for snuggling up on the couch and watching the Avengers.  Now, I'm not sure if it was just because he was tired, but he managed not to annoy the shit out of me with his over the top humor. 

I'm thinking this one is probably just going to end up as a good friend....     

Yeah, Maybe Not So Much

ANNOYED.

That's the word that comes to mind when I think of my last date with Chicago. When he called me up and wanted to know if I wanted to spend some time with him last weekend while out running errands, I thought "what the hell." I'd give me some more time with him and would technically count as a 4th date.

You know, I'm all for a guy with a sense of humor, but I just wanted to yell at him, "ENOUGH." Not everything has to be made into a joke and I'm all for banter, but you have to give it a rest at some point. It's flat out exhausting trying to keep up with his humor at times, and when a lot of it is directed at me, there is a point when it's a little much. Now, I can laugh at myself and poke fun, but there is a line there that he was stepping on, and it took a lot for me not to turn into a bitch on him.

A wise friend of mine said that if it annoys me now, it will for sure annoy me later one - which I know this to be true.  Another person asked if this might just be him still trying to impress me - it's been long enough that I am pretty sure this is him.  He has this thing with being right all time, and if you know me, you know this is poses a SERIOUS issue! Granted, I can admit when I am wrong, but I'm pretty fond of getting my way most of the time. Anyway, his need to be right causes him to never drop anything until he either proves his point, or you give in out of frustration. I have a friend like this, and I have learned just to give up since going around in circles is ridiculous. If you didn't know that he's harmless, you'd think it was borderline being an asshole. Obviously getting a rise out of people and getting them to "debate" (I call it arguing) is his goal in most situations. Makes me wonder if he would be able to hold any other type of conversation.

Now I know that I said he was a front runner a few days back, but I need someone that has sense of humor, but at the same time, doesn't make me feel like I am being the stick in the mud when I don't go along with every joke.

Just gets old...... 

Crash and BURN

You know how you get excited watching a movie trailer, and you just have to go see that movie?  And then you get there, buy the popcorn and sit through the whole thing, just to think to yourself, "damn, the trailer had all the good parts."  Well, that would be the best way to describe my date with Hitman. 

Hitman was the first person I have gone out with that I have talked to on the phone prior to the date. He had a great voice - the kind that you can listen to for hours.  Kind of a mix between baseball announcer and phone sex operator. Our phone conversation had been about an hour and we had no problem with any lulls in the conversation.  We both had our witty moments, and I was excited to meet up with him.

We met for sushi and when he walked up to me, the first thing that came to my mind was, "he's short." Yes, I have a thing with height - they have to be at least tall enough that when I wear my 4" heels, I am not looking them in the eyes.  I'm a girl that likes that I have to reach up on my tippy toes while barefoot to give a guy a kiss.  There was no way that this was happening with this guy - was he sure he was 5'9"? I almost asked to see his drivers license, but I figured he probably could have lied on that too.

The date just wasn't good...the conversation just wasn't there and his sense of humor fell flat.  He was trying to joke with the waitress, but we were in a sushi restaurant and you could tell that she was having a hard time getting his humor. It ended up just being annoying.  Not sure if he was just trying too hard, or if this was how he really was.

We ran out of things to say too early on in the date, and I almost had to text the "save me" password to one of my friends.  I really don't want to ever have to do that to someone, but this guy was really close!

At the time, I thought maybe he had sensed the same thing since he didn't protest that I was calling it a night right after dinner.  I was able to get away with just a hug, which in itself was somewhat awkward, but then I was home free! He did text me later saying he had a nice time and he would like to do it again.

Yeah, I don't think so....